rainy afternoon

i felt a little bored at work, so susana suggested i write a blog post.

so thought, why not, even thought there really ain’t much to blog about. oh well, there is ONE incident that i’d very much share, but then i don’t want to turn this blog into another bitching and ranting blog.

it’s just that this dude had stepped on my tail and i can tolerate him no more. seriously. has he not heard the phrase hell hath no fury like a woman scorned? and he did not scorn just one, but PLENTY!!!!! my gosh… i can burst into a volcanic eruption at the thought of his puke worthy face. urgh!!

*calm down*

anyways, no point talking bout the fagot. ignore him, just like what the lady said. he’s not worth my time and effort! hmph!!

okay, here. i gave you one post. say yay!!

boy and girl

in a typical everyday setting, boy meets girl and girl meets boy.

just as all couple, boy befriends girl and girl befriends boy. a steady friendship was formed and the friendship slowly evolved into something that is more complex — girl, inevitably, had fallen for boy. boy claims the same fate.

however, as normal and as harmless as it seems, the relationship that is developed between boy and girl is not a relationship at all. boy, is no longer a boy. way before his love declaration for girl, boy is already a father. girl, way before her love declaration for boy knows that girl will never be what she wanted to be.

when asked, girl confessed the agony and pain that had been torturing her every being. however, girl is not afraid to declare that despite the little moments of emotional turmoil, she felt no remorse for her action. girl claims her love for boy is stronger than her conscience, and though at nights she felt the tormenting conscience calling her names that are less than pleasing to the ears, she does not feel that her affair with boy was in any way wrong.

girl knows that the relationship is more sexual than emotional, and that boy is a beast of an animal whose sexual tank is never ever filled. girl acknowledges the lust burning within their souls that is overtaking their senses, and worse what is little left of  their sanity and realism. girl is living in surrealism, in fantasy, in her own self created, desired world.

when asked if boy cares for her tenderly and lovingly, girl could not answer. she paused for a split second before answering she thought he did. that, is the problem. she thought. she wasn’t positive. girl kept mum. she said not another word.

friend rationalized the situation with girl. girl listened. her door was not opened. it was left ajar. friend put a foot in, but that is all that friend could manage. friend could not squeeze through, and friend decided to not barge in. friend felt that friend had done almost what can be done: explaining the consequences, explaining the likely demise of everything girl hold precious. girl remained silent and looked at friend. after a slight pause, girl finally spoke her mind: she does not need help, despite the fact that this relationship will be and continue to be tormenting her inner soul. girl has chosen her fate. friend had decided to leave girl to her decision.

*************

here’s a little misconception that most women stupidly and willingly believes: if a man sleeps with her and told her he loves her, then he loves her. maybe he does, but most likely he does not. what he wants from you is not love. rather just a quick f**k to release his lust. no matter how gently he whispers his i love yous in your ears, he will never mean it. or at least he will never love you enough to leave his family for you.

there you have it, my two cents worth.  it is important to take heed of other people’s experiences. sometimes, whatever happen to people surrounding us are merely a full size mirror for us to really reflect and ponder. it serves as a vivid lesson and really help us rethink our actions, our decisions. it maybe harsh at times looking into the mirror with the reality staring back at you. but however harsh it is, it is necessary for us to always learn from mistakes.

shitty

i’m having this bouts of fever/cough/flu/croaky voice since forever. it just seems that everytime i’m feeling better, this crap of an illness has to come back and haunt my physical being.

i am feeling shitty now, no kidding, and i do hope that i’ll get well soon. like really soon. it sucks to be sick and maintain the  same weight. at least give me the credit of losing some kg just as consolation prize. geez.

angry

i just realised that i was pissed off over something, and that i really want to rant. since my fever’s gone, and that i’m feeling a little better if not much better, i shall rant it now  before it slips my mind.

actually, what i really want is justification that i’m the poor sickly thing that was being “bullied” into hard labour. must still have my “listen to me” moments (or what some would call it my king-kong moments) despite being sickly.

anyways…. back to the short rant (before really concentrating on work).  so i was back to mud city from my mini escapade to Malacca over the weekend, and on the day i arrived home (which was sunday), my body couldn’t take the exhaustion accumulated over the moving and driving, i had fallen sick.

so as i planned to sleep, and was actually already lying on my bed, the housemate had to knock on my door repeatedly to wake me up and drag me up to help her move furniture. i repeatedly told her that i was not fit to do physical hauling and that i was very sick. she refuse to take note and drag me up to carry what were left of 2 unwanted piece of furniture.

after the hauling and dragging, what was left of me was fever and sore throat. no joke. i was so weak and sick, i could barely stay awake on monday, and felt as though i was going to collapse anytime soon. refusing to get a medical leave, i still head up to the office, work, and then took my field trip to midvalley, and then when i really couldn’t take it any longer, i drove myself back home, plopped myself on the bed and took a nap.  and when night falls, i thought i was going to die and then i realize, i hate falling sick.

anyways… i guess i’m done ranting. it just piss me off that i had someone so inconsiderate as a housemate. but alas, let bygones be bygones. bury the hatchet and move on.

a page off the history book

remember pearl harbor?? remember the times when albert einstein’s uber famous nuclear bomb made its debut in japan??

well, that happened again. i played the role of hiroshima and nagasaki, and someone else’s the bomb.

i got nuked today.

not exactly tip top

not feeling that down, but things could’ve been better.

shit happens, but i’ll survive.

and you, stop bombarding me with your nitsy pitsy tiny little complaints. i’ve have enough of your rantlings already!!!

it’s official

i seriously HATE (with a passion) this equatorial humid weather. the heat is just too much!!!!!

i can’t sleep at all. and some one, donate me an air conditioning unit, please. 2 fans aren’t sufficient to keep this heat down.

i am not a piece of fruit

so i am not a banana. i read and write chinese, and i speak fluent mandarin. i speak fluent cantonese, too, okay… maybe with a slight accent, but it’s fluent cantonese!!!!

oh, and on top of that, i am not a spoil brat. i am actually very down to earth.  and yes, i am pure chinese. just cause i am fair it doesn’t mean i am a mix of different races. which of my facial features is so prominent that it makes me look unchinese?? none, right?? i have bulby nose, flat pancake face, dark brown eyes, dark hair, a slightly pale skintone, and none of these points to a mixed race feature.  oh, and just cause my name is not the usual chinese ah moi or ah hui “girly” names, that doesn’t make me a mixed race, too. no need to ask my mother. i am pure chinese. not cina mari, but malaysian born chinese.

so please keep in mind: i am not a banana, i am not a spoil brat, and i am pure chinese. oh wait, i am not arrogant, too (i am a very friendly person )…. so what else am i not? oh ya, i am not tall.

point is, it’s okay to ask me regarding my ethnicity or my comprehension of the chinese language. i won’t get offended. not if you are courteous about it. but if you threw questions at me in a rude demeanor or by asking very offensive questions, you better watch out cause you had just stepped on my tail. be watchful of your tongue when you are raising race sensitive questions. you might bring upon yourself unnecessary trouble if you don’t guard your lips.

ransom

mom was definitely panic stricken when she rang me up at 2:43 pm.  though she tried to compose herself, it was evident that she was upset. very upset.

here’s how the conversation went

mom: have you been in touch with your brother today?

me: nope, why??

okay… here’s the thing. my mom seldom (or never) called just to check on me whether i called my brother or not. clearly something is off, and for an instance i thought i am in for another lecture session on money management 102 – how not to burst your credit card.

okay, so the conversation continued:

mom: i received a call just now, and i heard someone on the other end of the phone yelling for help. i’m worried that your brother had been kidnapped. the voice on the other end said he had been kidnapped.

me: (skeptical frown) huh?? you’re serious??

mom: yes. and i’m so worried, the first thing i did is to call your brother. i called three times and he did not pick up his phone. and i called alicia and checked, and she said she had lunch with him about an hour ago. and i proceed to call his office and the girl told me he left for a meeting. but he’s not picking up the phone……

me: oh?? well, just wait and see lar… i’m sure he’s fine… just busy or something..

mom: i’m starting to panic lar.. hopefully it’s just a prank.. but just pray lar, ok…

me: ok, ok..

so my brother is being held ransom… hmmm…. i am very skeptical, and start sorting things out in my head… how can the kidnappers subdue and rather heavy man in his early thirties (in other words strong)?? and why are they not using my brother’s phone to call instead of using their own number?? won’t that set us on trail to hunt them down?? (yes i admit, too much CSI)

but on the safe side, i nudge my brother on MSN (and his status was busy), and of course no reply. i gave my sis in law a call, and she said she had lunch with him, and that she’ll try to call him again. and i gave my brother a call, too. but of course he failed to pick it up.

so thinking this issue over and over again, i gave my mom a call just to ask her when did she receive the all and she told me it was just minutes ago, and that my brother had returned her call. he was caught up in a meeting. a sigh of relief for my mom.

okay.. so clearly this is some trick to get us on our toes and i’m sure that the prankster kept his fingers crossed that we will take the bait and bring loads of cash to him, and then he can hold us at gun point and shove us to our banks and withdraw how little cash we have for him (this happens, okay… not to be taken lightly).

but thing is, these guys clearly have no conscience or whatsoever. if you’re hard up for cash, go make money legally, not harassing harmless citizen like us and scare the shit out of people. u want money, work your butt off for money. don’t prank call and use low grade trickery like that to loot money off the poor souls.

thank god we were clear headed and smart enough to wait and see the development of this sick joke.  and i hope anyone out there who faced the same situation, please, remain calm at all times and do not panic. i repeat. DO NOT PANIC.

and i hope these jokers get punished, like seriously.

fury

first, i am really, really busy at work. this is fine with me, the busyness of work at least gets me going and forget about my sadness. oh wait, did i say i was sad?? my apology. i’m not sad, but very emo due to some recent developments over some rather personal issues.

then, the clumsiness of me decided to get my tyre flat and had it replaced. it didn’t cost a bomb, really. the price was about right, but then there goes my moisturizer. fine. shit happens, it’s okay. as long as i’m in one piece, i’m fine. just take it as a lesson learnt (you know, changing a tyre) and will drive slow for the next 3 days.

then, it was the unthoughtfulness of someone who was on leave and happily napping away while i have to rush home and put on the apron and whipped out 3 dishes within 30 minutes and then shower and rush to church for duty. fine. the person’s inconsiderateness has started to really tick me off and get me all pissed. if you are home and your night meeting is later than mine, then yes i do expect you to assist at least a little in cooking, especially when you already have your beauty nap and i had to fight the traffic and rush home.

and the match that lit the fire was some stupid retarded idiot who has literally no skill in backing out his/her car and freaking scratch my car. damn it. if you don’t know how to park in a tight parking space then go somewhere else. bugger left a streak of paint on my car (crossing fingers that it’ll come off after polish) and dent my car too. screw that person that did that and without remorse. damn i’m more than pissed. i’m boiling inside. i’m so angry i want to cry and  scream and yell and smack somebody and stomp my feet at the same time. is that even possible??

but damn i am beyond angry. argh!! and that doesn’t help it when your throat is brewing a cocktail of soreness and dryness.

why do bad things happen to me when i am already half broke???   T_T  any volunteers to be my personal sandbag and let me whack for at least 10 minutes? i promise i don’t hurt (i’m so petite) and i won’t bite. just pure smacking. any takers?? anyone???